Beat Attorney Burnout: Find Happiness in Legal Practice

 

The Human Need for Positive Feedback

Welcome. This webinar today is about several really important points. Before I start, I want to tell a few stories because these stories shape a lot about what people need and what people often don't get in the legal profession. It is actually a very serious topic because I've seen so many people self-destruct, both attorneys and non-attorneys, based on what I am going to be talking about today. I've seen attorneys that I know commit suicide. I've seen people die prematurely, and I've seen people be in unhappy relationships with significant others. I've seen people have all sorts of problems based on what I am going to talk about today.

A long time ago when I was maybe fourteen or fifteen, I was living in Bangkok. One day this little puppy came into this condominium complex I was living in, and it was the nicest dog you could ever imagine. I brought it inside, and it was just having so much love and happiness, and was dying for affection and positive feedback, so I petted it. Then my family said, "You can't take a dog off the street," so we put the dog back outside. It was very sad, and I didn't think about it very much. A couple of months later I saw the dog, went up, and tried to be nice to it, but it growled, barked at me, and ran away. It had become a street dog. The dog became the way it was because no one loved it, no one took care of it, and it didn't get the kind of positive feedback it wanted from the world. That same sort of thing happens to a lot of people. A lot of people are dying for positive feedback, and when they don't get it, bad things happen.

Years ago there was a website called Gigots, essentially a job site that sold educational leads unethically. The guy that started it had been a big follower of my blog and credited it for helping get his life back, but he had also gone to prison before for similar scams. He started this job site around the time I was operating Employment Crossing and LawCrossing, which consolidate jobs in the legal profession. He called me, said he was a big admirer, and asked me to visit his thriving company in Orlando. He spent several hours telling me all his accomplishments, and to make him feel good, I told him he was doing really well. He was beaming and very happy. However, the business got closed down by the FTC and FCC because they were deceptively selling educational leads. He lost everything, his life blew up, and I think he killed himself. Even criminals are looking for love and positive feedback; when they don't get it, they figure the world doesn't care about them, so they do bad things and get in trouble.

My best friend in high school had a very successful brother and father. He started drinking heavily, using drugs, and flunked out of multiple colleges. In a very short time, he died of alcoholism in his 30s because he was in a position where nothing positive was coming back to him.

Another friend I knew in college was from rural Oklahoma. He was first in his high school class and got into the University of Chicago. When he got there, the academics were so far beyond what he was capable of doing that he started getting bad grades. His girlfriend broke up with him and got a restraining order. He was getting poor grades, not doing well, and not getting positive feedback from the school. He became a drug addict and alcoholic, got kicked out of the University of Chicago, and tried to go back to school in Oklahoma, but that didn't work out. He got into this position where he was getting nothing positive from the world, put a shotgun to his head, and killed himself. Positive feedback is one of the most important things for humans. People need to feel loved in relationships, feel important with friends, and get positive feedback in their jobs; when that doesn't happen, things fall off the rails.

   

The Consequences of Negative Environments

This idea of needing positive feedback in the legal profession is difficult because you often don't get the positive feedback you want. You typically don't get the grades you want, get into the school you want, or get the jobs you want. When you do get jobs, you don't get positive feedback from the people you are working for. When you advance, you may not have enough business, may get fired, or may be under stress because the only positive feedback you get is from the hours you bill. You don't get positive feedback all the time from judges or your clients.

Not getting this feedback creates depression, substance abuse, and promiscuity. I do not want you to feel like you are not getting positive feedback. Everyone needs encouragement and needs to feel loved; attorneys are no exception. You may be in a position where you are not getting the encouragement that you want, which affects your mood and creates depression. Attorneys are on antidepressants or alcohol because they are not feeling that encouragement.

Encouragement at work is extremely important. When I speak to attorneys and ask why they want to leave their positions, they often say there is no mentorship or support. In law firms especially, there is not a lot of encouragement; people are more likely to find fault with your work than to encourage you. People in the legal profession often feel unappreciated and are unable to get jobs.

The encouragement many people get is just from the number of hours they bill. There was a guy at Quinn Emanuel who had been working 2,800 hours a year. He didn't make partner one year and was very upset. Instead of getting angry and leaving, he decided to bill between 16 and 18 hours a day, seven days a week for four months. After that, the firm made him a partner outside their usual bylaws because he wanted it so much. He didn't get the encouragement he wanted, so he did whatever he could to get that validation. Attorneys who bring in business receive encouragement, but unless you are doing the best work, you may not get much. You often get negative feedback from clients, judges, superiors, and peers. Because this encouragement rarely comes, people become angry, withdrawn, or depressed.
 

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See Related Articles:

• Top 14 Ways Attorneys Can Avoid Burnout from the Stress of Practicing Law
• Managing Lawyer Stress: Strategies for Well-being and Success in the Legal Profession
• The Truth About Law Firm Life: Overcoming Attorney Burnout and Finding Alternative Careers

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Overcoming Toxic Relationships and Environments

The lack of encouragement often extends to people's families. You are often not getting that at home or feeling connected to your partner. When attorneys work so hard, they become exhausted physically and mentally and do not have a lot of energy to give to relationships. Many attorneys that work very hard end up getting divorced or having serious problems at home. When I was at Quinn, every partner there had been divorced.

I was in a bar when I was 22, complaining about a relationship, and sat next to a policeman. He told me that he had been sleeping with various women who were all the wives of men that were associates in law firms. It can be difficult to maintain relationships when you are working hard, have nothing to give when you come home, or are unpleasant because you have been feeling criticized. People get into this position where the only way they can show their love is by providing material things and making financial contributions, but that is never really enough. You want to be with friends and other people that value you and encourage you, not make you feel badly about yourself.
 

The Importance of Finding the Right Law Firm Culture

There are some awesome legal environments where you do receive encouragement and where you are around people that will accept you and make you feel good about yourself.

One problem with the way people search for jobs is they take the first job they get. As a consequence, you may wind up in a place where the culture is not right for you and you are around people that aren't like you. If you are around people that aren't like you, they won't see your value or encourage you.
 

How to Gain an Edge in Your Legal Job Search

To give yourself an edge when searching for jobs, you should follow these strategies:

• Find the right culture: Look for places where people identify with you.

• Use specialized job sites: Platforms like LawCrossing monitor employer websites to find hidden jobs that are not advertised on major platforms like LinkedIn or Indeed, decreasing your competition dramatically.

• Tap into the hidden job market: Research firms in your market that do your kind of work and send unsolicited applications. This often leads to interviews with firms that do not even have advertised openings.

• Expose yourself to multiple options: You need to give yourself multiple options to find a place where people will encourage you and advance your career.

If you are not feeling good and getting positive feedback, you may start entering into self-destructive behavior to eliminate the stress of not feeling accepted. People will often have affairs or start abusing substances to disconnect and feel good. Because they are not feeling good at work and feel trapped by student loans or families, they look for any way to get positive feedback.

Everyone measures themselves against other people to feel encouraged. When you start working, your validation comes through your hours, bonuses, reviews, and advancement. Most people in major law firms are unable to advance because there are not enough spaces in partnership. People measure themselves by the prestige of their firm and the size of their clients.

My daughter is in a top college right now. She started running a TikTok live stream giving advice to fans and suddenly began making between $10,000 and $25,000 a month. The academic people at her school thought what she was doing was weird, so she stopped getting positive feedback from them. She doubled down on live streaming to get positive feedback there instead. Everyone is doing the best they can to get people to accept them and feel loved. You should be around people that encourage you and bring out the best in you; it is one of the biggest keys to being happy and successful.
 

Finding Mentorship and Encouragement

When I was in eighth grade, I went to a formal private school in Grosse Pointe, Michigan, called Liggett. I was from a divorced family and didn't fit into that culture of wealth and privilege. I decided to make friends by rebelling and becoming a bad kid to draw attention to myself. I ultimately got kicked out and was getting bad grades, sometimes even when my work wasn't that bad.

I moved to Bangkok with my family, studied incredibly hard, and did everything I could to be accepted. I became president of my class, got incredible grades, and got on the varsity soccer team. I was getting very positive feedback from good teachers who brought out the best in me. It was all about the environment.

One of the most important things for attorneys is to find mentors. A mentor wants the best in you, helps you avoid mistakes, encourages you, and helps you make better decisions. Entire careers are made based on having mentors. I've seen partners making millions a year because they had mentors that believed in them and gave them business. I knew an exceptional Harvard Law attorney who didn't make partner simply because he didn't have anyone sponsoring and encouraging him.

I know a man who was in a very unhappy marriage with a woman who constantly criticized him and compared him to her wealthy father and friends. She made him feel excluded socially and unsuccessful as an attorney. He became depressed, got sick with immune issues, began drinking, and isolated himself. His wife eventually divorced him. As the divorce happened, his depression, sickness, and drinking disappeared. He started exercising, met new people, and became a much happier, self-confident man. Because his mind space was no longer filled with negativity, he got better at his job and started getting positive feedback. He realized he didn't lack value; he had just been around someone who didn't appreciate him.
 

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See Related Articles:

• The Importance of Law Firm Mentoring Programs
• How Becoming a Mentor Can Help Advance Your Professional Career
• How Do I Learn the Ropes without a Good Mentor?

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The Law Firm Feedback Timeline

For attorneys, the feedback timeline often looks like this:

• Summer Associate: The firm gives you nice feedback because they want you to come back.

• First-Year Attorney: The firm is often extremely critical in reviews to get you to improve, be detail-oriented, and not feel entitled. Most get mixed or negative feedback in their first year and a half.

• Mid-Level (2 to 7 Years): You become very profitable, need less hand-holding, and start getting very positive feedback.

• Senior Level: Feedback often becomes less positive as partnership decisions loom, and they may find reasons to ask you to leave.

This sudden shift from positive to negative feedback can be depressing and discouraging. If you are not getting positive feedback, you may feel trapped by obligations like student loans and mortgages, keeping you in unappreciative environments.
 

Taking Control of Your Legal Career

Many attorneys complain about hating the practice of law but refuse to leave because they are trapped by what others think of them. You cannot live your career being afraid of others' opinions. You have to take control of your career to do what works for you. I have seen attorneys who couldn't get hired start their own highly successful practices in family law, immigration, or personal injury.

You need to be around people that appreciate you. However, you must also be realistic about your skills. I once hired an older attorney who had a decent resume and 15 years of in-house experience. Shortly after, I realized her writing was poor, she couldn't form legal arguments, and her work was worse than a law student intern's. Despite giving her feedback, she just didn't have the skills and became a liability. If you are getting nothing but negative feedback everywhere, sometimes you have to realize that maybe you don't belong in a certain practice.

Some of the happiest attorneys I encounter are in rural or smaller markets outside the East and West Coasts. They work in smaller firms, are respected by their neighbors, get clients constantly, and receive positive feedback without working incredible hours.

As a recruiter, one of the things that makes me happiest is encouraging people and showing firms why a candidate is strong. If a good recruiter sees the best in you, it can change the entire direction of your life and career. Being encouraged helps you achieve more.

You are not powerless. You have choices you can make regarding your work, your health, and the people you associate with. No one should be in an environment that destroys their confidence. People leave the law entirely to become therapists, open bike stores, or write screenplays because they realize they will never be fulfilled as attorneys. When you do what fulfills you and makes you happy, you become much more successful.

While the first five years of law practice involve sacrifice and learning how to be an attorney, your work should ultimately bring you some enjoyment. If you are in a toxic situation, you have the control to do something else, even if it means letting go of your current identity. Put yourself in the right environments around people that are most likely to see the best in you, and you will have better careers and lives.
 

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Questions and Answers

 

Taking Temporary Legal Jobs

Question: Should I accept a contract or a document review job while looking for a permanent position?
If you went to law school and passed the bar, there is no need for you ever to work as a contract attorney or in document review while looking for a permanent position. Contract attorneys and document review attorneys aren't necessarily doing real legal work. The job is temporary in nature, and you are not learning how to be a lawyer or having someone take you under their wing. If you must take these jobs for the money, please do not put them on your resume, as it makes it look like you weren't able to get a job and no one was hiring you. Instead, you should be searching for a job aggressively using unsolicited applications and looking at multiple markets to increase your odds.

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Evaluating Career Stress and Burnout

Question: How do I figure whether my attorney burnout is temporary stress or a sign to choose a different legal career path?
Starting your career as an attorney can be very stressful because you are learning something new and trying to get ahead. Early burnout and feeling tired is normal because you start getting your work criticized and learn you're making mistakes. It takes about five years to become fully trained as an attorney in whatever practice area you are in. You should expose yourself to the stress of becoming a new attorney for at least five years to get training in the best firm you can, and then you can decide what your next path is. However, if you just hate the practice of law and can never see yourself doing it, then you should obviously leave earlier than five years.

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Following Up During the Hiring Process

Question: How should I follow up after applying for a law firm job or completing a legal interview?
If you feel like you are a really good fit for the job after applying, there is nothing wrong with picking up the phone and calling the firm to tell them you sent a resume and would really like to talk to them. After an interview, if you think it went well, you can send a short note thanking them for their time and expressing what appealed to you about working there. Law firms are much more likely to hire you if they think you truly want to work there.

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Spotting Red Flags and Assessing Firm Culture

Question: What are some of the red flags in interviews and jobs that should send us running? How can I check for culture?
Most people can get a sense of what a room or environment feels like when they walk into a law firm. You will either get a good feeling, or you will not feel good about wherever you're at. If an environment doesn't feel good to you or if you don't connect with the people, that is a clear red flag. The biggest red flag is if people are making no effort to connect with you and you feel like they are just there for you to get paid to do something, instead of taking you under their wing.

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Benchmarking Lateral Attorney Compensation

Question: How do firms benchmark lateral attorney compensation before making an offer?
The best way firms benchmark salaries is by simply asking the people they are interviewing what their current salary is. This is a fair question, and if you interview several people for a job, you will easily understand what the range is. Offering candidates a little bit more than their current salary will obviously help you land them. You can also use online tools, like the BCG search salary calculator, to help measure salaries for different firm sizes and markets.

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Navigating a Judicial Clerkship

Question: How can law students prepare for a judicial clerkship with a difficult judge?
Judges are generally looking for people to support their political outlook, so the most important thing you can do is to make sure you write opinions that support their specific slant. Furthermore, most of the work involves making the judge feel important and respected. You should talk to them with deference, get into work before the judge and leave after them, and try to get along with the administrative staff that works for the judge. Additionally, do the absolute best work you can by turning in well-reasoned work without any typos, because the judge's reputation depends heavily on how competent their work looks to the outside world.

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Tailoring Resumes for Specific Practice Areas

Question: Do you have any suggestions for tailoring a resume to corporate versus litigation positions?
The more focused your resume looks on the exact practice area of the job you are applying for, the better. If you are applying for a job that is all M&A, you should make your resume about M&A as much as possible right at the very beginning of the document. You might even need multiple different resumes if you handle different types of work so that someone looking at it will see exactly the type of attorney they want to hire.

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Managing Law Firm Favoritism

Question: How do I deal with favoritism at my law firm without hurting my career?
You should not worry too much about favoritism and instead put your head down to do the absolute best work you can. Your goal should be to do better, higher quality work than anybody you are in competition with at your firm. People that work the hardest and do the best work are ultimately always going to be rewarded. However, if you genuinely believe favoritism means you are never going to be advanced because everything is based on relationships, your best option is probably to look for another firm where that is not happening.

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Writing an Effective Cover Letter

Question: How do I write a strong attorney cover letter that gets noticed by law firms?
Cover letters typically aren't going to get noticed because very few people actually read them. You really need to put all of your effort into making your resume as strong as it can possibly be. The best cover letters are generally the shortest. If you do write one, you can mention if you have some sort of connection to the firm or have worked with them on the opposite side of transactions to say how much you admire them.

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When Law Firms Should Use Recruiters

Question: When should a law firm use an attorney recruiting agency instead of hiring internally?
A law firm should strongly consider using a recruiting agency if they are not attracting the sort of candidates they want in response to job postings while losing money on unfilled jobs. A good recruiter will cold call and email people to track down candidates very quickly. Using a recruiter is extremely profitable for the firm; the fee is usually not more than a few weeks of the new attorney's pay, but it opens an entirely new revenue stream of money.

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Recovering from Academic Probation

Question: What should law students do if they are placed on academic probation?
If you are placed on academic probation, you need to try harder to get better grades and become a better student. While you should evaluate if maybe this is not a field you can do well in, keep in mind that some of the worst law students go on to become some of the best attorneys because other skills are often more important than academic skills in practice. You must be highly motivated, and deciding to study harder and not take the opportunity for granted can push you to do much better.

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Securing a Legal Internship

Question: How can law students get a legal internship with no prior legal experience?
Law students are generally not expected to have any prior legal experience. To get an internship, you should simply contact every judge or firm you can that does what you want. I strongly recommend trying to work in a law firm, even if it doesn't pay anything, because you are multiple times more likely to get a permanent position in a law firm after graduation if you have that law firm summer experience.

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Negotiating Salary Below Market Value

Question: My salary is below market value and recruiters only seem to negotiate based on a percentage increase of my current salary. How do I fix this?
If your salary is below market and you cannot get an advance at your current company, you should apply to other places to try to increase your salary. You should not worry about one person saying recruiters base offers on a percentage of your current salary, as most recruiters do not do that. Recruiters are compensated based on a percentage of what you are making, so their job is always to try to get you the absolute highest salary possible.

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About Harrison Barnes

The Architect of the Hidden Legal Job Market

For most lawyers, an attorney job search begins with public job postings, law firm websites, and job boards. Harrison Barnes knows that the best opportunities are often found elsewhere—in the hidden legal job market, where confidential firm needs, quiet practice expansions, and customized roles are never publicly advertised.

As the Founder and CEO of BCG Attorney Search, Harrison has spent more than 25 years helping attorneys access opportunities before they reach the public market. He understands that law firms often hire strategically and confidentially, especially when seeking highly marketable lateral talent, replacing underperformers, or expanding key practice areas.

Harrison’s insight into law firm recruiting comes from firsthand legal experience. He is a graduate of the University of Virginia School of Law, a former federal law clerk, and a former associate at Quinn Emanuel. Early in his career, he saw that traditional legal recruiting was often reactive and overly dependent on posted openings.

To change that, Harrison built BCG Attorney Search into one of the most comprehensive legal recruiting platforms in the country. Over the past two and a half decades, he has invested heavily in proprietary law firm intelligence, attorney market data, and a nationwide recruiting team. This infrastructure helps identify legal career opportunities before they become visible to most candidates.

Harrison and his team do more than match resumes to job descriptions. They help attorneys understand their legal career options, improve their marketability, and position themselves as solutions to a law firm’s specific needs. Whether advising a junior associate, a senior associate, counsel, or a partner, Harrison focuses on aligning each attorney’s strengths with the right firm, platform, and long-term career path.

Through this approach, Harrison has helped place attorneys in thousands of law firms nationwide, from Am Law 100 firms to specialized boutiques and growing regional practices. His work has helped attorneys make career moves that many believed were impossible.

Today, Harrison Barnes is recognized as one of the legal industry’s leading recruiters and career strategists. His legal career advice, articles, webinars, podcasts, and resources such as The Legal Career Insider Substack are followed by attorneys across the country.

Harrison believes the best legal careers are built by finding doors others cannot see. Through BCG Attorney Search, he gives attorneys access to the hidden market—and helps them move toward the career they truly want.

This breadth of placements is unheard of in the legal recruiting industry and is a testament to his extraordinary ability to connect attorneys with the right firms, regardless of market size or practice area.

Proven Success at All Levels

With over 25 years of experience, Harrison has successfully placed attorneys at over 1,000 law firms, including:

• Top Am Law 100 firms such including Sullivan and Cromwell, and almost every AmLaw 100 and AmLaw 200 law firm.
• Elite boutique firms with specialized practices
• Mid-sized firms looking to expand their practice areas
• Growing firms in small and rural markets

He has also placed hundreds of law firm partners and has worked on firm and practice area mergers, helping law firms strategically grow their teams.

Unmatched Commitment to Attorney Success - The Story of BCG Attorney Search

Harrison Barnes is not just the most effective legal recruiter in the country, he is also the founder of BCG Attorney Search, a recruiting powerhouse that has helped thousands of attorneys transform their careers. His vision for BCG goes beyond just job placement; it is built on a mission to provide attorneys with opportunities they would never have access to otherwise. Unlike traditional recruiting firms, BCG Attorney Search operates as a career partner, not just a placement service. The firm's unparalleled resources, including a team of over 150 employees, enable it to offer customized job searches, direct outreach to firms, and market intelligence that no other legal recruiting service provides. Attorneys working with Harrison and BCG gain access to hidden opportunities, real-time insights on firm hiring trends, and guidance from a team that truly understands the legal market. You can read more about how BCG Attorney Search revolutionizes legal recruiting here: The Story of BCG Attorney Search and What We Do for You.

The Most Trusted Career Advisor for Attorneys

Harrison's legal career insights are the most widely followed in the profession.

• His articles on BCG Search alone are read by over 150,000 attorneys per month, making his guidance the most sought-after in the legal field. Read his latest insights here.
• He has conducted hundreds of hours of career development webinars, available here: Harrison Barnes Webinar Replays.
• His placement success is unmatched-see examples here: Harrison Barnes' Attorney Placements.
• He has created numerous comprehensive career development courses, including BigLaw Breakthrough, designed to help attorneys land positions at elite law firms.

Submit Your Resume to Work with Harrison Barnes

If you are serious about advancing your legal career and want access to the most sought-after law firm opportunities, Harrison Barnes is the most powerful recruiter to have on your side.

Submit your resume today to start working with him: Submit Resume Here

With an unmatched track record of success, a vast team of over 150 dedicated employees, and a reach into every market and practice area, Harrison Barnes is the recruiter who makes career transformations happen and has the talent and resources behind him to make this happen.

A Relentless Commitment to Attorney Success

Unlike most recruiters who work with only a narrow subset of attorneys, Harrison Barnes works with lawyers at all stages of their careers, from junior associates to senior partners, in every practice area imaginable. His placements are not limited to only those with "elite" credentials-he has helped thousands of attorneys, including those who thought it was impossible to move firms, find their next great opportunity.

Harrison's work is backed by a team of over 150 professionals who work around the clock to uncover hidden job opportunities at law firms across the country. His team:

• Finds and creates job openings that aren't publicly listed, giving attorneys access to exclusive opportunities.
• Works closely with candidates to ensure their resumes and applications stand out.
• Provides ongoing guidance and career coaching to help attorneys navigate interviews, negotiations, and transitions successfully.

This level of dedicated support is unmatched in the legal recruiting industry.

A Legal Recruiter Who Changes Lives

Harrison believes that every attorney-no matter their background, law school, or previous experience-has the potential to find success in the right law firm environment. Many attorneys come to him feeling stuck in their careers, underpaid, or unsure of their next steps. Through his unique ability to identify the right opportunities, he helps attorneys transform their careers in ways they never thought possible.

He has worked with:

• Attorneys making below-market salaries who went on to double or triple their earnings at new firms.
• Senior attorneys who believed they were "too experienced" to make a move and found better roles with firms eager for their expertise.
• Attorneys in small or remote markets who assumed they had no options-only to be placed at strong firms they never knew existed.
• Partners looking for a better platform or more autonomy who successfully transitioned to firms where they could grow their practice.

For attorneys who think their options are limited, Harrison Barnes has proven time and time again that opportunities exist-often in places they never expected.

Submit Your Resume Today - Start Your Career Transformation

If you want to explore new career opportunities, Harrison Barnes and BCG Attorney Search are your best resources. Whether you are looking for a BigLaw position, a boutique firm, or a move to a better work environment, Harrison's expertise will help you take control of your future.

👉 Submit Your Resume Here to get started with Harrison Barnes today.

Harrison's reach, experience, and proven results make him the best legal recruiter in the industry. Don't settle for an average recruiter-work with the one who has changed the careers of thousands of attorneys and can do the same for you.

About BCG Attorney Search

BCG Attorney Search matches attorneys and law firms with unparalleled expertise and drive, while achieving results. Known globally for its success in locating and placing attorneys in law firms of all sizes, BCG Attorney Search has placed thousands of attorneys in law firms in thousands of different law firms around the country. Unlike other legal placement firms, BCG Attorney Search brings massive resources of over 150 employees to its placement efforts locating positions and opportunities its competitors simply cannot. Every legal recruiter at BCG Attorney Search is a former successful attorney who attended a top law school, worked in top law firms and brought massive drive and commitment to their work. BCG Attorney Search legal recruiters take your legal career seriously and understand attorneys. For more information, please visit www.BCGSearch.com.